Lokuta Masu Mahimmanci Ga Ma’aurata

Wani matsalar da akasarin mata ke fuskanta a Zamantakewar auratayya sune na rashin sanin yadda ya kamata suyi mu’amala da mazajensu, duk da yake wasu lokutan suna sane suke yin wasu abunda domin cusgunawa mazajen su.

Sau tari matan suka ingiza mazansu cikin kuncin da suke ciki a maimakon kokarin fiddasu. Haka kuma mata kanyi sanadiyar jawowa mazajensu matsala a wuraren aiyukansu kokuma a harkar kasuwancinsu.

Da akwai wasu lokuta mahimmai ga mata a wurin mazajensu da matan aure da damar gaske basu da masiyar mahimmancin wadannan lokutan a wajensu, don haka maimakon suyi amfani da wadannan lokatan wajen kwantarwa mazajensu hankula, sai kuma suyi abunda zai jawo bacin rai a garesu dama mazajen nasu.

Wannan yasa wasu mazan suka gwammace fita suyi hira a teburan masu shayi da majalisoshin zaman hira.

Irin wadannan lokutan na tarairayan maza, mata sun maidasu ba a bakin komai suke ba, wasu matan ma basu san amfani ko kuma yadda zasu tafiyar da mazajensu a irin wadannan lokutan ba.

Da akwai lokutan da namiji baya bukatar yaji wani abu da zai tayar masa da hankali, da akwai lokacin da maigida yake bukatar jin labarin da zai farar ta masa rai, da kuma lokacin da yake son jin wata gulma daga gareki. Haka kuma maza suna da lokutan da suke bukatar jin mace tana musu hirar soyayya. Mata nawa ne sukasan irin wadannan lokutan kuma suke amfani da su yadda ya kamata?

Bari mu dauki lokacin da miji ya dawo gida bayan ya kammala kujuba-kujuban sa na yau da kullum, a lokacin da ya dawo gida domin ya huta ko ya ci a binci. A irin wannan lokacin ya zamewa mace dole tayi la’akarin da wace irin siga mijin ya shigo gidan domin sanin yadda zaki tinkareshi da kuma irin hirar da ya kamata kiyi masa a wannan lokacin.

Kada ki sake ki baiwa mijinki labari mara dadi a lokacin daya sanya abnci a gaba zai ci, yin hakan zai iya hanashi cin abincin yadda ya kamata, bacin ran labarin kuma ya dantanta ne da kwatankwaci girman labarin, misali idan labari ne wanda ya shafi rashi rai kona dukiya labarine da zai iya sanya miji ya stame hannu daga abincin daya ke ci. Irin wannan halin na baiwa mazaje labari mara dadi a lokacin ma mai gida ya zauna cin abinci mu daukeshi tamkar wata ibada a garemu.

Kada ki sake ki kawo gulmar wani da mai gidanki yake ganin mutuncinsa a lokacin da ya zauna cin abinci, haka kuma duk irin bacin ran da kike ciki kada ki sake ki nunawa mijinki a lokacin da kike zaune kusa da shi yana cin abinci ko kuma kuna ci tare. Ba karamin illa bane ki sanarwa mijinki ko ki kawo masa wata bukata wacce ki da kanki kisan baza iya ba a lokacin da yake cin abinci.

A lokacin da mijinki ya zauna zaman cin abinci, babu abunda yake bukatar ji daga gareki irin labarai masu dadi ji na abunda ya faru a cikin gida da kuma wajen gida. Maza suna bukatar addu’a na neman budi da kuma kambana kokarinsu akan ciyawarwa da kuma nuna masu ladan dake cikinsa a lokacin da suke cin abinci.

Idan kika kasa mata goma, bakwai daga cikinsu suna da al’adar amfani da lokacinsu na kwanciyar barci da mazajnesu a matsayin lokacin warware wata matsala ko kuma baiwa mazajen nasu wasu labarai marasa dadin ji. Wasu matan kuwa suna ware lokacin barci da mazajensu ne ya zama lokacin bala’i da kuma masifa a duk lokacin da wata matsala ta shiga tsakaninsu da mazajen nasu.

Wasu matan kuwa babu lokacin da suke ganin ya dace su muzanta wani, ko su shiga tsakanin mazajensu da wasu irin suyi amfani da lokacin kwanciyar barci domin yiwa mazajen nasu zantuntukan gulmace-gulmace.

Ya kamata mata su fahimci cewa, babu lokacin da yake da matukar mahimmanci ga dan adam musammam ma’aurata irin lokacin kwanciyar barci. Lokacine da idan suna bukatar hutu zasu huta batare da wani kunci a zuciya ba, haka kuma lokacin ne idan ma’aura suna bukatar saduwa ta jima’i da juna zasu yi cikin natsuwa da kwanciyar hankali, to mai yasa mata suke amfani da wannan lokacin domin tayarwa mazajenmu hankulansu?

Mu dauka a wannan daren baku sha’awar yin jima’i, yana da kyau ki kwantarwa mijinki hankali cikin kalamai masu dadi da tausasa rai har barci ya kwasheku, domin samun hutunsa akan lokaci kuma cikin kwanciyar hankali, shine kwanciyar hankalinki a matsayinki na matarsa. Haka kuma a duk lokacin da kika maida lokacin barci ya zama lokacinki na bala’i da masifa da miji, tabbas zaki shiga hakkin mijin naki, domin a lokacin da ranki yake bace kuma kike kokarin bata masa nasa ran, shi kuma sha’awar saduwa dake ne a ransa, amma kuma tashin hankalinki yakan iya hanashi ko kuma sha’awar tasa ta gushe.

Idan kuma kika ci gaba da hakan, watarana zai daina kwana gidan ko kuma kamin ya shigo sai ya biyawa kansa bukata a waje idan mazinaci ne, idan kuma mai tsoron Allah ne kina iya sashi kara wani aure ko bai shirya ba.

A lokacin kwanciyar barci, babu abunda maza suka fi sha’awar ji irin labarai ko hira na motsa sha’awa da kuma kalamai na soyayya hadi da kambama halitan miji, kuma ayi shi cikin tautausar murya ba cikin hayaniya ko hargowa ba.

A wannan lokacin koda batawa kuka yi kamin ko zo kwanciya kuna iya sasanta kawunanku cikin sauki ba tare da wani ya jikuba. Haka kuma idan wani kyauta miji zai yi miki yana iya yinsa a wannan lokacin ba tare da kin tilastashi ba ko kuma kin roka ba.

Kada ki sake ki kawowa mijinki wani labarin dazai iya kwantar masa da sha’awa, ko kuma wanda zai hanshi barci a lokacinda kuka zo kwanciyar barci, babu zance gulma ko tsaigumi, zantuntukan soyayya zalla shine abun yi a wannan lokacin.

Kada ki sake mijinki ya fita nema cikin bacin rai, ma’ana ya bar gida bayan kin bata masa rai, mata masu dabara da hikima suna kokarin ganin mazajnesu basu taka kofar gida da wani kunci na bacin rai a zuciyarsu ba, koda kuwa basu suka bata masu ran ba.

Idan kina sake kina batawa mijinki rai a lokacin da zai fita nema, wannan ranar kina iya jefashi cikin masifar da zai iya hanashi yin aiki yadda ya kamata idan ma’aikacine ne, idan kuma dan kasuwa ne kina iya dauke masa sha’awar zama a kan sana’ar tasa. Ga mazan da suke matukar son matansu kuwa, a wannan ranar basu iya yin katabus kuma hakan yana iya jawo kiga magidanci yana yawan fada da abokan aikinsa ko kuma abokar huldarsa.

Da fatan mata zasu fahimci lokutan da suka dace na irin hiran da ya kamata suyi da Mazajen su.

tsangayarmalam

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *